Chapter 30: Turns Out

Sheng Shaoyan tasted it.

He finally, without restraint, followed his heart and desires, and kissed Shen Xici’s eyes.

He swept away all the wet tears, the salty taste spreading on the tip of his tongue. He thought, wickedly and wantonly, that he hoped Shen Xici would cry even harder.

His lips moved down, brushing against the cheek to kiss the lips. At first, he only wanted to kiss them lightly, but the touch of the lips was too soft. As long as he held his lips, Shen Xici would seem to be out of breath, and the sound of his restrained breathing made him unconsciously increase his force.

He held the other’s lips, biting them firmly. Shen Xici was crying, his eyelashes like the wings of a butterfly soaked in spring rain. Not only the tip of his nose and the corners of his eyes, but because he was kneeling on the bed to kiss him, even his knees were red.

Even so, Shen Xici still raised his arms, wrapped them around his neck, and gasped, “A’Shao…”

A sharp honk from outside the window came in. Sheng Shaoyan’s eyes snapped open. The moist heat and tears were like flowers in a mirror, the moon in the water, immediately scattering into ripples.

In the quiet bedroom, the curtains were drawn, but they still couldn’t block the glaring afternoon sun. Light shone through the gaps, casting shaking bright spots on the wall.

He lay on the bed. Not far from him, Shen Xici’s breathing was steady. He was sleeping soundly.

Without turning his head to look, Sheng Shaoyan raised his arm and covered his eyes, waiting for his emotions to subside.

He had actually had… such a dream.

His throat was dry, and the salty taste of tears seemed to still linger on the tip of his tongue.

At this moment, Shen Xici, lying beside him, turned over. The “rustling” sound of the thin quilt was amplified, and amplified again.

Sheng Shaoyan turned his head, his gaze falling on Shen Xici’s lips. After a long while, he did nothing, got up, and left the bedroom.

At this moment, even he himself couldn’t be sure, if he let himself go, at what point he would stop.

---

Returning from the set, he had slept until sunset. Shen Xici had a disoriented feeling of not knowing what day it was. He opened his phone, and the homepage pushed a video update from someone he followed. A look, and it was Dong Yu again?

Shen Xici found it magical. Although the crew’s promotion team released various behind-the-scenes footage and stories every day, besides Zhong Yue and Wen Yage’s, his footage was the most numerous. But even if the quantity ranked third, the actual amount wasn’t much.

With just this little bit of material, how did this master called “Dong Yu” manage to be so prolific, and even make every video into a work of art?

He clicked on the link and finished watching the video in a few minutes. Shen Xici marveled in his heart, He really did make it into a work of art again!

The bullet comments and comments section also exploded.

“—Emitting a sharp scream! He actually edited it from a boyfriend’s perspective! I don’t care, the leaf was blown for me, the smile was for me!”

“—The boyfriend is a handsome young man from a minority group who grew up in the mountains. He was discovered while playing a tune at the tribe’s sacrificial ceremony, entered the entertainment industry to film, and finally became a big star! This plot is too addicting!”

“—Shen Xici looks so good in his own clothes! Master, more, more, please produce more content. I can’t watch other mashups anymore. After eating a good meal, everything else tastes bland!”

Slipping on his slippers, he walked out of the bedroom. Seeing the golden red of the sunset outside the balcony, Shen Xici asked, “A’Shao, when did you wake up? Why didn’t you sleep a little longer?”

As he spoke, he inadvertently glanced at the computer screen. Huh? The flashing image, why did it look so much like the mashup video made by Dong Yu that he had just been watching?

He asked directly, “Are you also watching that mashup video?”

Sheng Shaoyan, who hadn’t dared to look at the sleeping Shen Xici for too long and had ended up editing videos instead, calmly closed the video editing software without a change in expression. “Yeah, what do you think of it?”

Shen Xici sat down beside him. “The most amazing thing about the master is that not only is he a master, but he’s also a growing master! It hasn’t been long, right? His editing skills are even better than before. The details and transitions are getting smoother and smoother, and the beat drops are extremely satisfying.”

Sheng Shaoyan leaned lazily against the sofa, pretending to listen to this praise absentmindedly. A small smile unconsciously appeared at the corner of his lips. But when he thought that in Shen Xici’s mind, all these words were praising someone else, that joy was greatly diminished.

---

The next day was another sunrise shoot. Waking up at four in the morning, Shen Xici’s previously healthy routine of sleeping and waking up early was completely shattered.

Because he had slept until dusk the day before, he couldn’t fall asleep at night at all. At four in the morning, he couldn’t get up. Standing in the night wind and yawning, tears welled up in Shen Xici’s eyes.

Sheng Shaoyan swung his long leg over the motorcycle, holding the handlebars and tilting his head to look at him. “Lean on my back and get some sleep.”

Shen Xici felt it wasn’t quite right. To sleep while leaning on someone on a moving motorcycle without being thrown off, he would need to hug Sheng Shaoyan like a koala, right? But the thought of being able to catch up on sleep was very tempting. “Can I?”

Even for something like this, Shen Xici was hesitant and dared not, afraid he would be displeased.

How bad was I to Shen Xici before my amnesia?

With his leg propped on the ground, Sheng Shaoyan reached out an arm and pulled Shen Xici over. “Get on. Lean however you want.”

It had to be said, Sheng Shaoyan’s shoulders were broad and his back was straight. He looked very good, and he was also really good to lean on. Shen Xici slept groggily all the way, his soul floating. When they reached the parking spot at the set, he rubbed his eyes, still a little out of it.

“Do you want me to carry you down?”

Carry what? Carry me down?

He was twenty-one, not one. Shen Xici quickly got off the motorcycle, rubbing his face, trying to rub away the sleepiness. “No need to trouble you. I’m already awake!”

Sheng Shaoyan grabbed his wrist and pulled his hand away. “Doesn’t it hurt? Your face is all red from rubbing.”

He then naturally held Shen Xici’s wrist and led him a few steps forward before letting go and putting his hand back in his pocket.

Wen Yage had just gotten out of her car and saw the small action of the two holding hands and then quietly letting go. She thought to herself, It really is the tricks of a young couple. She teased, “Should I have stayed in the car a little longer before getting out? I didn’t disturb you, did I?”

Shen Xici turned his head, a little surprised. “Teacher Wen? Why are you here too?” He immediately thought, “Are there scenes to be reshot?”

“You guessed right. Director Wan isn’t satisfied with a few shots and asked me to come and reshoot them. But they’re all action scenes. I’ll go to Group B and film with the assistant director. That way, we can both get off work early and go back to catch up on sleep.” Wen Yage pinched her arm. “I’ve been filming fight scenes all night, falling and rolling on the ground. My waist is sore and my legs hurt. Your role is better, you only need to stand on a tree.”

Shen Xici joked, “Teacher Wen, the description of standing on a tree really makes me sound like a monkey.”

Wen Yage had lived in Sui County for over a month and could understand a few simple dialect phrases. She also laughed. “How successful would evolution have to be to evolve a monkey as good-looking as you?”

Seeing that Shen Xici was in a good mood, she became a little more serious and asked, “After filming that scene yesterday, your expression was very off. You couldn’t get out of character?”

Shen Xici hummed in agreement. “A little bit. I was trapped in emotions and memories that didn’t belong to me. It felt terrible, especially thinking about waiting wholeheartedly for his family to come back, but his mother and sister would never come back.”

After a moment of silence, he tried to make his tone sound less heavy. “But it got better later. I cried, and it was like I had shed all the tears belonging to the mute boy.”

Wen Yage’s expression, however, became serious. She advised, “You’re not a student from a film academy, nor have you taken professional classes. To be able to act to this extent, both talent and diligence are indispensable. But likewise, Shen Xici, getting into character is a very dangerous thing. Especially for actors who haven’t received professional training, it’s very possible to enter a role and not be able to get out. I’ve seen colleagues who became depressed, or even schizophrenic. There are not a few such cases.”

“Thank you, Teacher Wen,” Shen Xici told her. “When the director shouts ‘cut,’ I will do my best to separate myself from the mute boy and come out of his shadow.”

But it was easy to get into character, and hard to get out. He didn’t know to what extent he could do it.

In his previous life, after filming the role of the undercover agent Ah Zheng, for nearly two months, the habits and walking posture of Ah Zheng still lingered on him. He really was like an undercover agent, often waking up in the middle of the night from a slight noise outside the door, the string of vigilance in his mind always taut.

Later, he filmed “Tou Tian” with Wen Yage. He played the second male lead, Yu Yan. After filming wrapped up, for more than a month, he had been having intermittent low-grade fevers and insomnia. He went to the hospital for countless check-ups, but they couldn’t find the cause.

It wasn’t until a few months later, when he was having dinner with Wen Yage, that she suddenly said, “Shen Xici, have you noticed that the tone of your voice isn’t your own, but Yu Yan’s? Yu Yan is used to holding a water cup with his left hand. You’ve held a water cup five times, and not once did you use your right hand. But you’re not left-handed at all.”

It was only at that moment that he was startled to realize that he was still trapped in the character’s shadow and had never come out.

No one had taught him what to do. He could only try and fumble through it again and again.

Wen Yage’s expression softened. “It’s good that you’re aware. This kind of thing happens to any actor who gets into character. Everyone has a different method. For me, for this reason, my craving for cigarettes gets very strong when I’m filming.”

Shen Xici gently advised, “The pictures in my textbooks tell me one thing: smoking less is healthier.”

“I know, I know. You’re not old, but you’re already starting to nag? After filming, I won’t even think about looking for a cigarette.” Wen Yage asked him, “What about you? After filming, when you get your pay, what are your plans?”

Sheng Shaoyan, who was walking beside them, also looked over.

Shen Xici: “I don’t have any specific plans yet. I’ll find a place to stay first.”

Wen Yage raised an eyebrow. “Planning to buy a house?”

Shen Xici smiled. “I do have that plan, but I also have to be able to afford it. The housing prices in Ningcheng are too expensive. But I’ve been working hard to save up.”

Wen Yage, being in the entertainment industry, had seen too many people who had been filming for two or three years but couldn’t take out any money when something happened. She appreciated Shen Xici’s approach. “That’s good. You’re young. Don’t spend your pay randomly. Saving money to buy a house is a good idea.”

The two were not going to the same place. They didn’t chat for long before Wen Yage left.

Sheng Shaoyan, who had been silent all along, spoke up, “You want to buy a house?”

“Yeah. If I buy a house, I’ll have a place that’s a home.” Shen Xici immediately lightened his tone. “The housing prices in Ningcheng are too expensive. I’m just thinking about it. Thinking doesn’t cost money.”

A very self-aware poor man.

---

As soon as they arrived under the ancient tree at the filming location, Shen Xici was called to the cliffside by Director Wan Shan. “The crew ran around in the mountains for a long time before they found this place. It’s the safest, most suitable, and least likely to have continuity errors.”

With the help of the high-mounted lights, one could see that the “cliff” next to the ancient tree was not steep. It was about ten meters high. Many of the shrubs and rubble at the bottom of the cliff had been cleared, and a large life-saving air cushion had been laid out. There were also staff members standing by.

“Are you afraid of heights?”

Shen Xici shook his head. “I’m not afraid of heights.” He smiled. “Director, don’t worry. I’ve been mentally preparing for a long time.”

The time he had stayed up all night to revise the script, the mute boy’s final ending had been changed by Director Wan to jumping off a cliff. Plus, Director Wan didn’t like green screens, feeling that the current special effects couldn’t meet his requirements. He would rather take a large crew to the deep mountains to film on location. It was a no-brainer that the cliff jump would also be filmed on location.

“It’s good that you’re mentally prepared. When the time comes, you’ll jump directly from that thick branch you’re standing on. The air cushion below will catch you, and there will be people on the side to assist. Don’t be afraid.”

Director Wan Shan held a large stack of storyboard drawings and continued to explain the scene to Shen Xici.

“The emotions of the mute boy’s short life must all be displayed in this shot. What emotions do you think there are?”

“In my understanding, he lived in the mountains with his mother and sister. Although they were very poor, picking a bunch of wildflowers or catching a fish were all moments of happiness. He looked forward to growing up into a reliable adult and giving his mother and sister a better life. Their family were outsiders in this village. The old village chief and the people from the criminal organization were worried he would betray them, so they took his mother and sister away. He was pained, he blamed himself, but he was powerless. He always missed his family. He led the way for the pursuit team and couldn’t bring himself to kill Du Yu because of his kindness and compassion. He also had expectations for the pursuit team, hoping they would succeed so that his family could come back.”

Wan Shan asked him seriously, “Is he afraid of death?”

Shaking his head, Shen Xici replied, “He’s not afraid. He has no home, no family anymore. So there will be tears in his eyes, but he won’t cry. Instead, he will smile, because he is about to go find his mother and sister. He is about to have a home.”

---

Shen Xici stood on the thick branch and jumped off the cliff. But either the camera angle was wrong, or the lighting wasn’t good enough, or under the lens, Shen Xici’s expression wasn’t divine enough, or the posture of his jump wasn’t beautiful enough.

After jumping so many times, Shen Xici had even developed a habit. As soon as he stood on the tree, he would have a conditioned reflex to want to jump down.

After sunrise, Wan Shan sent Shen Xici back to rest and called all the group leaders for a meeting to adjust the filming plan for the next morning.

Back home, Shen Xici collapsed directly onto the bed, asking with a sense of hopelessness, “A’Shao, how many times did I jump off a cliff this morning?”

“Eight times.”

“…” Shen Xici experienced firsthand how physically demanding cliff jumping was. He couldn’t help but mutter under his breath, “In a martial arts novel, if you jump off a cliff eight times, even with only a fifty percent drop rate, you could still get four peerless martial arts manuals.”

But the reality was, after jumping all morning, there wasn’t a single usable shot.

He had to continue jumping tomorrow morning.

After saying a few words, Shen Xici fell asleep. Gently closing the bedroom door, Sheng Shaoyan went downstairs, planning to buy some fruit and then pack lunch to bring back.

In the corridor, the landlady who lived downstairs was just coming up, carrying the groceries she had bought. She greeted him with a familiar tone, “Handsome boy, going down? The fruit at Granny’s stall is so fresh today. You guys can buy some to try!”

Sheng Shaoyan, wearing a black mask, politely thanked her. Just as he was about to leave, he heard the landlady ask, “The rent you paid is about to expire. Are you renewing?”

“Not renewing.”

The landlady’s curiosity was written all over her face. “Are you still renting after this? Where are you going to rent?”

Sheng Shaoyan answered simply, “Maybe rent, or maybe buy a place.”

The landlady’s eyes lit up, and she smiled broadly. “Aiya, planning to buy a house! Are you two planning to get married? Then congratulations in advance! Just as Granny said, your sworn brothers’ relationship is indeed very good!”

The incandescent light in the corridor lit up with the sound of footsteps. Passing under the spiderwebs entwined on the black rubber electrical wires, Sheng Shaoyan pushed open the stainless steel security door downstairs.

The spring sun was dazzling. Sheng Shaoyan walked in the shadow of the buildings.

He had said he was saving money, that he wanted a home. But when he asked about it, he had immediately changed his tune, saying he was just thinking about it.

Was he afraid he would refuse, or be displeased?

His pre-amnesia self had not been good enough to Shen Xici.

He hadn’t expected it either.

Turns out, in Shen Xici’s heart, he wanted to marry him, wanted to have a home.