On the way home, they passed by a large supermarket. Qi Huai asked Yoon Nam-hyuk if he wanted to go in and have a look. Yoon Nam-hyuk was afraid that they would be awkward if they went home and just looked at each other, so he agreed.

Unexpectedly, they ran into Amanda and her boyfriend outside the supermarket. They were fighting again.

This was the first time Qi Huai had seen Amanda’s boyfriend. He was a white boy in his early twenties, with dry blond hair and huge dark circles. He was handsome but had a decadent temperament. He was not as tall as Qi Huai, but a little stronger.

Qi Huai frowned, inexplicably feeling that the other was a drug addict.

He parked the car in the parking lot and didn’t know whether he should get out with Yoon Nam-hyuk. If they got out, they would definitely be discovered by Amanda. He was afraid that the proud girl would feel embarrassed.

“Let’s wait,” Yoon Nam-hyuk said in a low voice. “Amanda should be here to buy groceries. We’re not in a hurry to go back. We can just go home after she goes back. Let’s pretend we don’t know.”

Qi Huai nodded.

The two of them originally wanted to lower their seats and take a nap. They thought that after about an hour, the bickering couple would have finished fighting no matter what. Unexpectedly, in less than ten minutes, the incident escalated.

Amanda’s boyfriend pulled out a knife from somewhere. Amanda was terrified and covered her face, screaming. Yoon Nam-hyuk didn’t even have time to react before Qi Huai opened the car door and rushed out.

A person who was short of money and drugs and was in the middle of withdrawal didn’t have much strength. He had only pulled out the knife to scare his girlfriend and get some money to buy drugs.

When Qi Huai rushed over aggressively, the drug addict was scared to death. He waved the knife in the air. When he saw Yoon Nam-hyuk also get out of the car, he was even more cowardly. He immediately threw down the knife and ran.

Amanda cried and gave him the middle finger. “FUCK YOU! Joey! We’re over from now on! Don’t you ever come looking for me again, you coward! Don’t you ever let me see you again!”

They didn’t go to the supermarket. Qi Huai said he would give Amanda three days off with pay. Amanda didn’t have to cook tonight either. They could order pizza and drink beer. Amanda would drink by herself, and the two of them, who were under twenty-one, would watch.

Amanda wiped her tears and said no. Instead of being idle and overthinking, it was better to put her energy into her work. They would still have pizza for dinner, and Amanda would make it herself.

On the way back, Amanda said a few words about herself and her boyfriend. It turned out that the other was a former colleague of Amanda’s, a rather talented dessert chef. Amanda’s best cookie recipe was the other’s creation.

Later, they both left that restaurant and developed their own careers. Amanda’s goal was to save money while working and improve her cooking skills. When she had saved enough money, she would go to Italy to learn Italian cuisine, then continue to work and save money, then go to France to study, until she had learned all the cuisines she was interested in, and then choose her favorite country to live and work in.

At that time, they were passionately in love. Joey said that he would support whatever decision Amanda made. Joey himself would also work hard to make money and go abroad with Amanda to study.

But later, for some reason, Joey became a drug addict. First, he spent all the money he had saved for going abroad over the years, and then he started borrowing money from Amanda.

Of course, he didn’t tell the truth when he borrowed money. Amanda thought Joey was going to further his studies, so she gave him the money without hesitation, because Joey had also supported Amanda in the same way.

Later, Joey’s condition got worse and worse, and his drug addict appearance was almost impossible to hide. No matter how much Amanda was blinded by love, she could see that something was wrong. The dispute broke out from then on.

The better and sweeter the relationship was in the past, the more painful the heart was when the relationship went downhill. The two of them had been entangled for two years like this. Amanda wanted Joey to go back to the past, and Joey wanted to as well, but he couldn’t.

Later, by chance, Qi Huai and Father Qi went to the restaurant where Amanda worked for dinner. The chef’s recommended dessert of the day was hot cookies with ice cream. Qi Huai ate three large pieces in one go. The next day, Amanda was poached by the wealthy Father Qi and became a high-paid private chef for a rich family. She could save a lot of money, and her dream of traveling the world to study was within reach.

Time is so terrible. A passionate couple who used to sneak cookies together in the back kitchen a few years ago, now one was living in heaven and the other was in hell.

Amanda had tried countless times to pull the other into heaven, but all she got was endless quarrels and demands for money. Until today, the other had somehow found out where she often went and had specially come to the supermarket to wait for her.

He even brought a knife to get money.

“My dad can help you, if you need it,” Qi Huai said while driving.

Amanda was in a much better mood and didn’t refuse. “Thank you. I’ll ask Mr. Qi if I need help. Thank you for helping me today.”

It was inconvenient for Qi Huai to drive, so Yoon Nam-hyuk hugged Amanda and patted her on the shoulder to comfort her.

What happened today left an indelible impression on both of them. That night, Amanda fell asleep after drinking beer. It was the first time Yoon Nam-hyuk had stayed overnight at Qi Huai’s house, and he squeezed into the same bed with him.

It was hot even with the air conditioner on.

It was not the heat that steamed the skin, but a kind of scorching emotion that overflowed from the bottom of the heart, a heat that tormented a person from the inside out.

Yoon Nam-hyuk was covered in sweat, but he didn’t move even though it was hot. He stared at the ceiling with his eyes open.

“You say…” Qi Huai suddenly asked, “If we hadn’t shown up, would he have hurt Amanda?”

Yoon Nam-hyuk said, “He would. A drug addict has no reason.”

Qi Huai: “How did it become like this? They were clearly in love. The past Joey was willing to give Amanda anything, but today he hurt Amanda for his own sake.”

“What Amanda said was the Joey in her eyes, but what she saw might have been fake,” Yoon Nam-hyuk felt the same way. “A foolish person will choose the wrong partner. My mother is one of them.”

Qi Huai suddenly turned over and stared at Yoon Nam-hyuk in the darkness. “How can you choose the right partner?”

Yoon Nam-hyuk: “I don’t know.”

Qi Huai asked again, “Then what kind of girlfriend do you want to find in the future?”

Yoon Nam-hyuk couldn’t help but turn over too, but he turned his back to Qi Huai. “I don’t want a girlfriend.”

Don’t want a girlfriend?

He said he doesn’t want a girlfriend.

Qi Huai’s heart suddenly churned with excitement, excitement, and impulse. He didn’t know what it meant, let alone whether it was good or bad, but he just suddenly wanted to do it.

He propped himself up and went to扳Yoon Nam-hyuk’s chin, asking non-stop, “Really? You really don’t want a girlfriend? Why?”

Yoon Nam-hyuk quickly closed his eyes. “No reason. I’m tired, let’s sleep. You should sleep too.”

Of course, Qi Huai wouldn’t let him. He was in a state of excitement. He reached out to touch Yoon Nam-hyuk’s pants, and as he touched, he said, “If you don’t find one, I won’t either. I don’t want a girlfriend either. But if you don’t find a girlfriend, you’ll become an electric drill. Have you changed yet? In the morning or at night?”

Yoon Nam-hyuk was scared to death. “What’s it to you! Go to sleep! Stop messing around! Qi Huai!”

It was midsummer and both of them were wearing very little. Qi Huai was shirtless with a pair of shorts, while Yoon Nam-hyuk wore a tank top with large armholes, so a large area of skin would be exposed with any movement.

Qi Huai’s hands were moving up and down. Tonight’s Yoon Nam-hyuk seemed even better to look at than the first time he saw him in the swimming pool. Qi Huai’s breathing began to quicken, and he wanted to lie in Yoon Nam-hyuk’s neck again, as if that was the only way to relieve his sudden excitement and anxiety.

However, as they were fooling around, Yoon Nam-hyuk suddenly began to pant, and Qi Huai’s palm was indeed holding an electric drill.

Those jokes were all stuck in his throat at that moment. Qi Huai’s Adam’s apple rolled for no reason, and even his forehead began to sweat.

But he didn’t let go.

The two of them were in a stalemate like this. Qi Huai felt that he should let go, but he couldn’t bear to let go. His mind and heart were in a mess, and he seemed particularly silent.

Yoon Nam-hyuk felt that he had understood something from this silence. He suddenly covered his eyes in embarrassment and didn’t dare to look at Qi Huai’s expression at all. His voice was as soft as a mosquito’s. “I’m sorry… I want to be alone for a while.”

I’m sorry?

Qi Huai was confused. What are you sorry for? I should be the one who’s sorry.

However, before he could speak, Yoon Nam-hyuk begged, “Can you let me be alone? Please, Qi Huai, please.”

Qi Huai’s mind went blank and he quickly got up. He was like a fool and didn’t know what to say. He watched Yoon Nam-hyuk curl up into a ball in the quilt.

“I want to be alone,” Yoon Nam-hyuk said from under the covers.

Qi Huai’s limbs were stiff. Yoon Nam-hyuk said he wanted to be alone, so he went out and planned to go to the guest room. But after he came out, he felt that something was wrong. He felt that the two of them should talk it over. However, just as his hand touched the doorknob, he heard a sob from inside the room.

The other was crying.

Oh no, I did something bad.

I made him cry, Qi Huai thought… At this moment, he suddenly felt as if he had eaten something very, very bitter. From his tongue to his stomach, it was all a sour and bitter taste. Certain things that were still in their budding stage seemed to have been shattered.

He felt that Yoon Nam-hyuk hated this kind of touch.

Qi Huai tossed and turned all night. He only fell asleep when the sky was starting to get light. When he opened his eyes again, it was already past nine o’clock.

As soon as he woke up, he jumped out of bed and ran to his own bedroom. He wanted to see if Yoon Nam-hyuk was in a better mood, and more importantly, he wanted to clear things up about what happened last night.

However, the bedroom door was open, and it was empty inside. There was a note on the table, left by Yoon Nam-hyuk.

“I’m going home. I think I need to calm down. I’m sorry for all the trouble I’ve caused you this past year.”

What does this mean…

Qi Huai was stunned. What does it mean to calm down? What does it mean to have caused trouble? Is he breaking up with me? Why? Just because…

“Hey, what do you want for breakfast…” Amanda was stunned. “Where’s Yin?”

Qi Huai opened his mouth woodenly and held up the note in his hand. “He broke up with me.”

Amanda: ?

An hour later, Amanda, who was not exactly a veteran in love, finally understood the whole story.

She couldn’t help but grin. “Oh… I see. No wonder you’ve never had a girlfriend. So many pretty girls have pursued you, but you’ve never been interested. You like boys, don’t you?”

Qi Huai was speechless. “Me? Like boys?”

“Isn’t it? Isn’t it?” Amanda’s eyebrows danced with excitement. With gossip right in front of her, she had completely forgotten about her own heartbreak. “Come to think of it, it’s really strange. You’ve been almost inseparable for the past year. You’ve never been like this with any other classmate. I thought it was because Asians have a common language, something like coming from the same cultural circle. But it seems that’s not the case.”

“It’s not, is it?”

“Come on, little baby. Just look at the way you two looked at each other in the car yesterday. You knew what the other was going to say. I was stunned. I’ve been in love three times, and I’ve never been like that,” Amanda spread her hands in regret.

She added, “Now that I think about it, you two are really like you’re in love. You just haven’t slept together… oh! You did sleep together last night, but you messed it up, dear.”

Qi Huai was silent for a long time.

It was hard to say whether he had really figured out his own sexuality, but if the other was Yoon Nam-hyuk, it seemed that there was nothing wrong with it. Qi Huai’s expression was extremely dejected. “…Then what should I do? Why is he so angry? Does he think I like him, but he doesn’t like me, so he’s avoiding me?”

What’s wrong with me…

Except for my gender, he added silently.

“Go ask him yourself, dear. No matter what the result is, at least ask clearly,” Amanda patted him on the shoulder.

However, before Qi Huai could think of an excuse to meet Yoon Nam-hyuk, Father Qi came home first. He said, “Qi Huai, come to my study for a moment. I have something to tell you.”

Yoon Nam-hyuk had secretly run home last night because he was worried that with that guy Qi Huai’s personality, he would come to his bedroom door to block him as soon as the sun came up.

He left a note, looking back every three steps, feeling miserable. His mind was full of the shocked expression on Qi Huai’s face when he discovered he was hard last night.

That’s right, I like boys, he thought. And I don’t like all boys, I only like you.

This past year was the happiest time in his life. If a one-sided love was also love, then Qi Huai was his first love. Perhaps he was like his mother, without the blessing of enjoying love.

Anyway, he had to go back to Korea sooner or later… In a few years, Qi Huai would forget him, and then he would have a career, a family, a wife, and children. In short, he would have a happy and perfect life without him.

As for Yoon Nam-hyuk himself, he would live a good life with this unforgettable memory. Maybe he would forget the other too? I hope so.

“Little kyung?” Hyun Si-young hesitated at Yoon Nam-hyuk’s bedroom door for a long time before finally knocking timidly. “Can we talk?”

Yoon Nam-hyuk was stunned. He said “mm,” but his heart was in a turmoil, overflowing with reluctance.

Before coming to the United States, Hyun Si-young had said that they would only stay for a year to relax and then go back to Korea. Now, thinking about it, a year had indeed passed. Was it time to go back?

But…

Although he had made up his mind to “break up” with Qi Huai, he was not really ready in his heart.

This place was full of their memories. If possible, he wanted to stay a little longer. A month… three months… if it was half a year, of course it would be even better…

“Little kyung, have you been getting along well with Xiao Huai during this time?” Hyun Si-young asked with a smile. “Amanda said you two have been playing well and are together every day. Do you still like him?”

Yoon Nam-hyuk’s pores all over his body suddenly opened up, and a layer of hot sweat broke out. He didn’t understand what his mother meant by asking this, so he just mumbled a response and then asked what was wrong.

Hyun Si-young’s expression was also very hesitant. She did not notice Yoon Nam-hyuk’s abnormality and continued, “Actually, it’s like this. I should have told you earlier. After all, you are more mature than the average child, but for some reason, it has been delayed until now.”

Yoon Nam-hyuk suddenly had a bad feeling.

The woman sighed and hesitated for a long time before she said, “Well… actually, your Uncle Qi and I have been getting closer recently. He’s a good person, and we…”

Yoon Nam-hyuk suddenly understood. “You’re in love?”

Hyun Si-young paused and nodded.

Yoon Nam-hyuk’s heart suddenly went cold. He felt that the only remaining hope was gone. He tried his best to remain calm and said, “Are you… getting married?”

Hyun Si-young quickly waved her hand. “It’s not at that stage yet.”

Not yet, which means it’s possible.

Yoon Nam-hyuk stared at the ground with a wooden expression, thinking, if my mother marries Qi Huai’s father, then he and Qi Huai will become “stepbrothers,” a relationship where they are so close yet can’t cross the line.

It’s not good for me. But for my mother, she deserves a better life.

Qi Huai is a good person, and Uncle Qi is also a good person. Mom is very lucky to have met the right person at the right time and in the right place, and to be integrated into a new family. It’s just that my own luck is a little worse.

Yoon Nam-hyuk nodded. “I wish you happiness, Mom.”

Hyun Si-young was pleasantly surprised. “Really?”

But she suddenly noticed that Yoon Nam-hyuk’s expression was strange, so she said with concern, “Little kyung, if you’re not willing, it’s okay. You must tell me. Actually, for a person of my age, whether to remarry is not that important. We—”

“That’s not what I mean,” Yoon Nam-hyuk smiled and hugged Hyun Si-young. “I was just taken aback. I’m happy for you. To be in love with the person you like, what a rare thing. Mom, you can’t miss it. You must not miss it.”

Hyun Si-young’s eyes turned red with emotion. “Thank you, my Little kyung.”

Just like that, Hyun Si-young and Father Qi each confessed this matter to their own sons.

Yoon Nam-hyuk’s plan to return to Korea with his mother was cancelled. Under Father Qi’s arrangement, he would attend the same high school as Qi Huai, in the same grade but in a different class.

On the day of enrollment, Father Qi drove, Ms. Xuan sat in the passenger seat, and Qi Huai and Yoon Nam-hyuk sat in the back.

It was unknown whether it was related to the adults’ love affair, but Qi Huai did not look for Yoon Nam-hyuk after that day. Today was their first meeting after the small note incident.

Yoon Nam-hyuk was particularly silent, always looking out the window with a dazed expression, not knowing what he was thinking.

This silence made Qi Huai flustered.

During this time, he had asked both Amanda and his father what it meant to like someone.

Amanda said she didn’t know either. She only knew that when she liked someone, her heart would pound, and she would think about the other person all the time, whether she was eating, sleeping, or working. That person’s shadow would even appear in her future plans.

Although that person had turned bad, she would still think of their sweet days together and couldn’t let go for a while.

“But I’ll forget him,” Amanda said. “When he raised a knife at me, he was no longer worthy of my love… perhaps he was never worthy. I was just too stupid and ran away too slowly.”

Qi Huai thought about what Amanda said. His heart was pounding. He had this symptom, and it was getting worse the closer he got to Yoon Nam-hyuk.

As for always thinking about the other person, he was not quite sure, because they had been together almost every day for the past year. It was hard to say whether he was thinking about him or not. He could see him just by looking up. He had been thinking about him a little these past few days, mainly about how to make Yoon Nam-hyuk stop being angry. He didn’t know if that counted.

As for future plans…

He hadn’t thought about anything too far ahead. He had only asked Yoon Nam-hyuk if he wanted to go to the same university, and the other had said he would see.

See how it goes…

Alright, even if there is liking, it’s probably just a one-sided crush.

Father Qi’s answer was not so specific. He said, “It’s actually very difficult to define what liking is.”

Some liking leads to physical pleasure, like fireworks, which disappear in a flash once the goal is achieved.

Some liking leads to responsibility, possession, and uniqueness. This kind of liking is usually called love, and it is something that needs to be managed to last.

No matter which kind of liking it is, it needs practice and time to verify.

It’s so complicated, Qi Huai thought. Practice and time? How to practice? Try it out physically once? He was old enough, but what if Yoon Nam-hyuk was not willing?

As for time, well, since his father and Aunt Xuan were in that kind of relationship now, he and Yoon Nam-hyuk would have plenty of time in the future. They could slowly verify it, so there was no rush.

“Kids, get out of the car,” Father Qi stopped at the school gate. “Qi Huai, Nanhe has a lot to do on his first day of school. You should accompany him.”

Hyun Si-young smiled gently. “See you tonight, kids.”

Qi Huai nodded in agreement, and Yoon Nam-hyuk also smiled. They stood there and watched the adults drive away. The moment the car’s tail disappeared, Yoon Nam-hyuk’s smile faded.

“You don’t have to accompany me. I can do it myself,” Yoon Nam-hyuk said with his eyes downcast. His English was very good. Those procedures were just a matter of running to a few more teaching buildings, either asking for directions or looking at a map. It was not difficult.

“I…” Just as Qi Huai was about to speak, a sudden whistle interrupted him. A handsome boy waved his arm and greeted Qi Huai from a distance.

“Hey! Qi!” The other had beautiful blond hair, deep blue eyes, and sun-kissed skin. He had a good figure, and at a glance, he was the kind of popular prom king in school.

He ran over and first greeted Yoon Nam-hyuk very politely, then he spoke to Qi Huai with great enthusiasm, without any distractions. Before leaving, he even hooked his arm around Qi Huai’s neck and ruffled his hair.

Yoon Nam-hyuk pursed his lips.

A breath of air was stuck in his chest.

Qi Huai was really popular. The further he walked into the school, the more obvious this feeling became.

The boys and girls coming and going were all greeting Qi Huai. Those who noticed Yoon Nam-hyuk would wave at him. Those who didn’t notice Yoon Nam-hyuk were almost glued to Qi Huai’s handsome face.

That’s right, a child from a wealthy family, who was good at all sports, had excellent grades, a gentlemanly personality, and was a tall and beautiful mixed-race, was simply a heartthrob, right?

Yoon Nam-hyuk felt sour in his heart. “You have a lot of friends.”

Qi Huai peeked at Yoon Nam-hyuk’s expression, thinking he had high EQ. “They’re not really friends, at most they’re classmates I’m a little familiar with. We don’t have much interaction in private. My only real friend is you.”

Yoon Nam-hyuk felt even more sour.

That’s right, a friend. He only thinks of me as a friend.

Yoon Nam-hyuk’s original idea was to follow his mother’s arrangement, finish high school with Qi Huai here, and then when it was time for university, he would see which school the other applied to and just stay away.

When the time came, and as time passed, that feeling of a crush should fade.

But Yoon Nam-hyuk now felt that he probably couldn’t go to high school with the other. Because he couldn’t accept Qi Huai having other “friends.” He was jealous.

A storm of sourness and bitterness was raging in Yoon Nam-hyuk’s heart, clamoring for him to be a little more selfish, not to think too much, and just eat what he liked.

But Yoon Nam-hyuk felt that he couldn’t not think about it. After all, this was not just his own business. He also had to consider his mother and Uncle Qi’s feelings. When Yoon Tae-min found out he was gay, he was so angry he wanted to kill him. What about Uncle Qi? Would he also be angry?

If the excellent Qi Huai was “led astray” by him, would Uncle Qi break up with his mother in a rage and then beat Qi Huai? He didn’t want that.

Thinking of this, Yoon Nam-hyuk suddenly stopped in his tracks and let out a long sigh. “Qi Huai, actually, I wasn’t mad at you that day. I was mad at myself. I felt embarrassed, so I ran away.”

“Embarrassed?” Qi Huai didn’t understand. “We’re not strangers. Besides, I was the one who touched you randomly…”

“No, you don’t understand,” Yoon Nam-hyuk took a step forward and turned his back to Qi Huai, then turned back again, his face full of hesitation. Finally, he decided to confess. “Actually, there’s something I’ve never told you. I like boys. You didn’t want to know how I got the scars on my waist? It was because of this, I was beaten by my father. But my mother doesn’t know about this. Please don’t tell him.”

Yoon Nam-hyuk: “The reason I felt embarrassed was because I had known you for so long and never confessed to you, and I let you get close and do such intimate things. It was my fault. I scared you, didn’t I?”

He… likes boys? Qi Huai was in a daze, standing there speechless.

Perhaps the more you care, the more you are afraid of losing. When Yoon Nam-hyuk saw him like this, the courage he had just mustered up immediately dissipated. He lowered his eyes and bit his lip. “No matter what, our friendship will not change. If my mother and your father get married in the future, we will be brothers… It’s good to be friends and brothers for a lifetime.”

At least it won’t be like him and Yoon Tae-min, who had a falling out. And it won’t be like Amanda and her boyfriend, who held on because they couldn’t let go, to the point where all the beautiful memories became a long-accumulated resentment. This is really too cruel to the beautiful past.

“That’s it then. I’m going to the academic affairs office first. Bye,” Yoon Nam-hyuk said and ran away. Qi Huai didn’t even have time to say a word.

This feeling is so complicated…

Qi Huai found it hard to describe. On the one hand, he was happy that Yoon Nam-hyuk was not angry with him, and that saying these words meant he wanted to make up. On the other hand, he was happy that Yoon Nam-hyuk had taken the initiative to share a secret with him, a secret that even Ms. Xuan didn’t know.

Also, the other was actually into boys, which was great. At least they wouldn’t have the kind of situation Amanda had mentioned, where one liked women and the other liked men.

No, wait, am I assuming I like boys?

But then he felt empty again, because Yoon Nam-hyuk had just said that they were friends, brothers for life. It seemed that there was no element of liking in these two relationships.

No, no, no, that’s not right. Many loves start from friendship. They are already friends now. Just as Dad said, let time verify the rest.

They were now together in everything, from food and clothing to housing and transportation, and even going to school. They had plenty of time.

Qi Huai jumped on the spot like a madman and said, “Yes!”