Chapter 23: N. Anonymous Friend

The call ended abruptly. Before he could speak, the line went dead; it seemed there was no desire for further conversation.

Ning Yixiao did not pull the phone away immediately; the dial tone was almost preferable to the blessing he had just received. Even for a second longer, he suspected he would have blurted out a defense to Su Hui, though how laughable that would be—to say such things at this moment to someone whose relationship with him had ended six years ago.

Perhaps Su Hui would only have said, with innocent confusion, “Is that so? Why a fake engagement? You two look like a perfect match.”

Once he imagined that response, it was like a bottomless pit widening at his feet, and Ning Yixiao could only retreat, step by step.

The car window was knocked twice. Ning Yixiao looked up to see Bella standing outside, one hand resting on the half-opened window, head tilted. “Is my phone in your car?”

Ning Yixiao said nothing, pretending that nothing had happened, and handed it to her.

“You look terrible. What’s wrong?” Bella leaned in to get a closer look, but Ning Yixiao turned his face away. She couldn’t help but laugh. “With this temper of yours, it’s a good thing we’re just faking an engagement. If we really lived together, I’d be miserable. You wouldn’t be like this to your real future wife, would you?”

Ning Yixiao didn’t want to hear anything regarding the engagement or a wife; he looked uncooperative. He looked at Bella and said, “I want to move the engagement ceremony up.”

“Why?” Bella blinked.

“Because I want to end the engagement as soon as possible,” Ning Yixiao said.

Bella nodded. “Fine, I want that too. I just signed the agreement with my father’s lawyers; on the day of the engagement, the trust funds and real estate belonging to me will be transferred into my name.”

“Since you want to hurry, I’ll release the word to the media later so they can leak the news. There might be some photos taken, if you don’t mind.”

Ning Yixiao had no reason to mind. When the engagement was discovered by Su Hui, he had worried that Su Hui might care, but it now seemed that was just wishful thinking.

Back home, Ning Yixiao began a conference call. This was the fourth round of acquisition negotiations. He barely spoke throughout the entire meeting, showing even more indifference than usual. His poker face was interpreted by the other party as a “tactic.” The meeting lasted two hours, and when it ended, nothing was set in stone. Oqia was not willing to concede, providing new conditions, but all were rejected.

Everything was proceeding according to his plan; he only needed to wait for the media reports, and Oqia would surely compromise.

Later, Jing Ming video-called, saying he had returned to San Francisco and stopped by Ning Yixiao’s home. Jing Ming knew the password—he had been the one to pick out the house. He didn’t shy away from admitting that he had gotten too drunk at a nearby bar the night before and had gotten into a fight with someone, so he had escaped and run to Ning Yixiao’s place to sleep.

“I didn’t realize I was sleeping in the living room until I woke up. I had a total blackout. It’s terrifying.”

Ning Yixiao was used to his outrageous behavior. “I hope you didn’t vomit on the carpet.”

“Why are you so cold? Is the carpet more important than me?” Jing Ming shook his head in the video. “Although my alcohol tolerance is average, my behavior when drunk is excellent, okay?”

“Is that so?” Ning Yixiao looked down at his documents without raising his head. “Who was it that got drunk and opened the door to every room in my house, spilling popcorn in every single one?”

“Why bring that up now…” Jing Ming felt speechless, but then remembered something. “Hey, right, that thing—I think I accidentally ran into your other room yesterday…”

Ning Yixiao snap-shut his folder and stared at his guilty friend on the screen.

Jing Ming gave a dry laugh. “Oh, I just opened it. I didn’t vomit or spill popcorn. But I don’t know if I was drunk or what, but there were so many butterflies in that room—white ones. The wind was strong last night, and they kept turning and turning, making me dizzy.”

Ning Yixiao’s expression changed instantly. “Who told you to go in there?”

Jing Ming was stunned. “Huh? You never told me I needed to report in before entering your house… it was always like this before.”

He didn’t know why Ning Yixiao was unhappy, but he instinctively felt it was about the butterflies he just mentioned, so he quickly tried to distance himself. “I didn’t touch your things! I even closed the window for you. You haven’t been home in so long, the window was wide open, and the sea breeze was so strong…”

He went on, but Ning Yixiao didn’t take much of it in. He hadn’t told Jing Ming about anonymously purchasing the installation art.

“There was a letter under your little butterflies,” Jing Ming recalled, remembering he had almost stepped on it yesterday.

“What letter?”

“Just… something from a Seattle art museum. I didn’t see clearly yesterday. Let me go look, wait for me…” Jing Ming walked slowly upstairs, crossing the sun-drenched atrium until he reached the room. “Right, a letter from the Seattle Art Museum. Should I open it for you?” Jing Ming shook the envelope in his hand.

“Yes.”

He read it carefully. “Thank you for your purchase. The world turns and changes every second, but every collection captures a moment when an artist’s inspiration bursts forth. We have specifically left the museum’s contact information and the creator’s email address for every piece; you are welcome to communicate at any time.”

Jing Ming flipped it to the back. There were indeed two lines with email addresses. “When did you buy art, you engineering geek?”

“I liked it, so I collected it.”

Jing Ming looked up at those butterflies. “This doesn’t seem like something you would like, let alone buy and hide at home.”

Ning Yixiao said nothing. After a long silence, he told Jing Ming, “Take a picture of the email address and send it to me.”

“Oh.” Jing Ming complied, but Ning Yixiao ruthlessly ended the call.

The moment the photo was sent, Jing Ming felt something was odd. He took another look and realized the creator’s surname was Su.

Su…

He suddenly understood, then dialed back immediately. But Ning Yixiao wouldn’t pick up no matter what.

Jing Ming screamed internally. He couldn’t understand why there could be such a lovesick person, especially one as cold-faced and heartless as Ning Yixiao. He found it unbelievable and was deeply curious about what kind of person could have him unable to let go for six years.

He was clearly such an unyielding guy.

Staring at the email in the photo and the number saved in his phone, Ning Yixiao fell into a state of bewilderment and self-struggle.

Stripping away his painful childhood to become an adult, he had told himself countless times that self-esteem was the most worthless thing, bringing no profit. But his self-esteem remained terrifyingly high. He couldn’t trace it back to a specific moment—was it being bullied by peers until he couldn’t speak, or being spat upon as a “bastard” and watching his mother be bullied, or standing before Ji Tailu and listening to him use the most polite words to humiliate him, bloodily displaying the gap between him and Su Hui?

Or perhaps it was the morning after the breakup, when he set aside everything to go find Su Hui to ask for one more chance, only to be met with his complete disappearance.

It had been wrong from the start. He should have stuck to his initial thoughts and pulled away decisively when he knew he was going to get stuck, not to be seduced, not to be drawn into the vortex.

If he hadn’t happened to witness the Manhattanhenge with him, hadn’t looked into his eyes at that moment, hadn’t had that one second of impulse, he would be much better off now.

Manhattan’s winter felt like another world. There was no sun-drenched Sunset Boulevard, no crowd hugging and kissing in the spectacle; snow buried the roads, and the grey metropolis was like an airtight petri dish, moving vehicles and crowds, all ants waiting to be studied.

Su Hui occasionally missed his past self, having the courage to stand on a pedestrian bridge and look his love in the eye. If it were now, he would probably be a mess.

The ward was warm. His grandmother occasionally regained some consciousness, but speaking remained very difficult. Su Hui didn’t tell her the extent of her condition, only saying that the surgery would make her well. In truth, whether there would be a turning point, he didn’t know; no one could give him a definitive answer. It was like his own illness; no one told him if he would ever get better.

Bella Jones returned his call and explained that her purpose in calling was simple: she had noticed Su Hui sent many emails regarding installation art, mostly asking for her advice. But Bella told him that he was free to create whatever content he wanted, and generously offered to provide all the materials needed for his production.

Su Hui was very grateful, feeling that compared to his current self, Miss Jones was indeed a better match. She was beautiful, kind, full of affinity, and emotionally stable; she had almost no flaws. According to Carl, she and Ning Yixiao were both students at S University, alumni, and their families had business dealings. From any perspective, they were a perfect match.

During this gloomy time, Su Hui stayed at the hospital, waiting for his grandmother’s surgery. His own illness was well-controlled by medication; at least his emotions didn’t have large swings.

However, one thing happened that cheered him up—the collector who had anonymously purchased his work a while ago contacted him via email. The other party’s email was a string of numbers, seemingly newly registered.

The email was sent at night, and Su Hui only noticed it the next morning. The collector said hello, expressed his love for the work, and sincerely encouraged him. This kindness from a stranger felt warm. Perhaps this collection had great significance to Su Hui, or perhaps because the collection had given Su Hui a lot of help; these were things Su Hui kept in mind and always wanted to thank him for in person.

So, he replied to an email. Perhaps his recent mood affected his writing, but when he received a reply again, the other party actually asked him if he had encountered some trouble.

Perhaps because there was no one to confide in—Grandmother couldn’t know, Liang Wen couldn’t know, and the doctor wasn’t someone he could rely on. Ning Yixiao, who was about to enter a new stage of life, was even less of a good choice. Su Hui subconsciously felt a brief desire to confide in this kind stranger.

But his wording was calm and brief, summarizing recent events in as simple a manner as possible, while leaving out everything related to Ning Yixiao.

The other party replied.

[I am very sorry. If there is anything I can help with, please let me know.]

Su Hui thought for a moment.

[This is already very good; no further help is needed. How should I address you?]

After a long time, he received his answer.

[Sean.]

Sean. Su Hui noted his name in his contacts.

These days in the hospital, he often communicated with Sean. Emails were not like instant messaging software—not so fast, and the rhythm wasn’t urgent. He didn’t need to be uneasy about every incoming conversation and could speak very relaxedly with this kind stranger. The other party would wish his grandmother well, would show concern for his life without overstepping, and would send some not-too-humorous jokes.

Sometimes Su Hui didn’t find them funny, went to do something else, then suddenly realized what they meant after a while and chuckled to himself while looking at the water kettle.

[Sean: Would you find it bothersome if I contact you like this? Will it disturb your private life?]

Su Hui replied quickly.

[Eddy: No, actually I don’t have much of a private life. Most of the time I’m alone and have no one to talk to. I’m very happy when I see your emails.]

[Sean: Do you not have close friends, or a lover?]

When he received this email, Su Hui was helping his grandmother massage her hands and feet and didn’t check it in time. Ten minutes later, he received another one.

[Sean: Maybe my question just now was a bit offensive. I just feel that someone like you shouldn’t live too alone.]

Ten minutes later, Su Hui’s reply arrived as promised.

[Eddy: Everyone lives very alone. It’s just that some people know how to disguise it, and some people don’t have the energy to disguise it. My body isn’t good, I can’t manage relationships well, let alone emotions. Maybe through email, you think I’m still a decent person, but if we really met and spent time together in reality, you might not be able to stand me :)]

He added a smiley face, frankly stating his imperfections.

[Sean: I don’t believe that. You must be a very lovely person.]

Perhaps because he had a friend he had never met, time flowed faster than usual.

Su Hui barely had to wait before the day of the surgery arrived. To fulfill his work duties, Carl arrived at the door of the operating room very early. But he seemed very busy, dealing with other work, phone calls constant, occasionally going to a corner by himself to make calls.

During this time, he received a few messages of concern from Sean, but because of his anxiety, he only replied briefly.

Liang Wen, who was also busy with work, specifically rushed back to New York and kept Su Hui company for the morning. But because there was a seminar, Liang Wen had to leave. Before leaving, he spoke to Su Hui about Ning Yixiao.

“I saw the reports. It looks like he is going to get engaged.”

Su Hui didn’t look like he had slept well, leaning against the wall, only nodding without speaking.

Liang Wen hesitated for a moment, then said: “I actually feel a bit of regret, not meeting you earlier. If that were the case, I might have had more capital to compete.”

Su Hui’s mind was a mess. He thought there was no such thing as competition. Ning Yixiao had his own life, and they had no relationship whatsoever. As if by a passively triggered protective mechanism, he didn’t want Liang Wen to drag Ning Yixiao into this.

“No, you misunderstood,” he said. “He and I are already strangers; there’s no possibility. You don’t need to compete with anyone…”

A throat-clearing sound came from the side. Su Hui turned back and saw Carl in the corner; he looked a bit helpless. “Sorry, Eddy, I didn’t mean to interrupt you.” He pointed to the operating room on the other side. “The nurse is looking for you; she asked me to help take you there.”

Su Hui nodded, taking back the second half of what he hadn’t said. It wasn’t the first time he had rejected Liang Wen, and even without explaining, he believed Liang Wen could understand.

Carl walked in front, feeling uneasy in his heart. Having accidentally overheard their conversation, he realized that Liang Wen really did love Su Hui. But who was the “he” Su Hui spoke of, who had no possibility, Carl didn’t know. However, looking at Ning Yixiao’s attitude, he seemed very dissatisfied with Liang Wen and Su Hui’s further association. Although Carl had some reservations about this feudal, patriarchal attitude, based on past experience, Ning Yixiao’s decisions were almost always correct.

Complications added significant difficulty to the surgery. Nearly ten hours later, the resection surgery finally ended.

“Doctor, how is my grandmother?” Su Hui asked immediately.

“The patient is currently in stable condition, but she must be observed in the ICU for 48 hours first. Family members should go rest first; the hospital will notify you immediately if there is anything.”

Su Hui nodded, his heart still unable to settle. What he didn’t know was that Ning Yixiao had reached out in advance, telling the doctors and nurses here that Su Hui suffered from bipolar disorder, asking them to observe his condition and provide help if necessary.

The nurse saw he looked exhausted and, thinking that staying in the hospital for too long would be detrimental to him, reminded him: “You can go home and rest for two days first. Anyway, you can’t enter the ward. There are special medical personnel here to take care of her, so don’t worry. When you come back, you can bring some daily necessities familiar to the patient; when she wakes up, it can help soothe her emotions.”

Although Su Hui was unwilling to leave, he followed the nurse’s suggestion. He had already taken leave for many days; he at least had to return to school.

Seeing he seemed to be leaving, Carl offered to drive him. Su Hui initially refused, but standing at the hospital entrance, he couldn’t get a taxi, and when Carl drove up to him again, refusing further would seem too heartless.

In the car, Carl asked him kindly how the temperature was, and Su Hui nodded, saying it was fine. There wasn’t much conversation between them, but Carl was thoughtful and measured, and Su Hui’s burden decreased bit by bit. Just because of Carl’s identity, Su Hui always worried he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from asking too many questions about Ning Yixiao, which wasn’t a good thing. He knew he should learn to keep his distance now.

“Shaw has called me several times just now; he is very concerned about your grandmother,” Carl said while driving. “I have never seen him so concerned about his own family.”

This sentence touched Su Hui’s heart. He thought for a moment before speaking. “Do you know about his family?”

This actually stumped Carl. He thought back carefully; Ning Yixiao, who always had him do everything, seemed to have never mentioned his family.

He shook his head and turned the steering wheel. “Not really clear. He almost never mentions his family, and he lives alone to this day.”

Su Hui lowered his eyes. As someone who knew, he didn’t know how to defend Ning Yixiao. Even now, he still didn’t want Ning Yixiao to be seen by others as too heartless.

“But your grandmother is his family too, isn’t she?” Carl said suddenly.

This made Su Hui freeze. “Did he say that?”

Carl only then realized he had said too much. “Um… he said the reason he insisted on helping was because Ms. Yang had indirectly helped him in the past, and he also said his situation was difficult at the time, and he had a hard time. Although I don’t know exactly what happened, Eddy, he genuinely wants to help you.”

These words made Su Hui very sad. Recalling their ill-fated romance from six years ago, he felt a pain that felt like a lifetime ago.

“Yeah.”

Carl dropped him off downstairs at his apartment. He lowered the window to say goodbye to him. He was very hungry, and after watching Su Hui go upstairs, he got out of the car and bought a hamburger at a roadside shop. He had just taken a bite when Ning Yixiao called.

He had to put down the hamburger and report everything that happened at the hospital today, including the conversation between Liang Wen and Su Hui that he accidentally overheard. He thought that Ning Yixiao seemed to not support them, and this conversation just happened to explain some issues—for instance, Su Hui’s current attitude toward Dr. Liang didn’t seem that ambiguous.

After recounting it, Carl took another bite of the burger and muttered to himself, “It’s just that I don’t know who the ‘he’ Eddy mentioned is, and he even said there’s no possibility between them. Probably someone he doesn’t like? I would have been better off going over a bit later.”

Unexpectedly, his boss’s voice suddenly turned cold, as if he were angry.

“Since you know that stalking is illegal, why were you eavesdropping?”

“It wasn’t you…”

The phone hung up.

Carl held the phone, shivering in the cold wind, not knowing what he had done wrong. He checked his boss’s follow-up appointment date again. Something is wrong. I need to take him to see a doctor immediately.

Su Hui returned to the rented apartment. He hadn’t been back since his grandmother was hospitalized; it was messy and uncleaned.

He simply cleaned the room, sat down at his desk, checked his work email, and replied to the messages he hadn’t handled. Then he saw his “Sent” folder, his communication with Sean. It had been nearly seven hours without a reply, which was strange. According to Su Hui’s observations, Sean was someone who valued time; every reply was controlled to around fifteen minutes. Sometimes when it took longer, he would apologize.

He felt like an old-fashioned and upright person.

[Eddy: Is something the matter? Are you okay? If you encounter difficulties, you can tell me anytime.]

Fifteen minutes later, Su Hui still received no reply.

Worried that the other party might have had an accident, he opened Sean’s profile, only to find so much blankness—almost no effective information, no mobile phone number, or other contact information; there was simply no way to find him.

Connection between people is truly fragile. As long as one side cuts it off, the other side may have no other way.

Su Hui thought, falling into memories of Ning Yixiao. Aren’t we like that?

As his mood gradually sank, the computer screen lit up, and he received a new email.

[Sean: I’m a little unhappy. Do you have anything happy you can share with me? I think my mood will get better faster that way.]

Su Hui set his heart at ease but fell into new trouble. He hadn’t had anything happy in a long time.

Searching his memory, he was like a child with no way out, constantly flipping through his own dull diary, as if every page only contained worries. As he flipped, he flipped back to a very, very long time ago.

He did indeed have a very happy short period in his life, although it was only a brief six months.

[Eddy: Where do you live? Seattle? I currently live in New York, for about a year or so. But actually, a long time ago, I came here once to attend a seminar. At the time, I only felt New York was very big, and everyone was so free.

I also remember it was an evening. I was supposed to have dinner with my teacher, but I led a guy away, leaving the main group with him. The two of us walked and walked on the streets of New York, getting lost.

Later, we found a road sign that said 42nd Street. I was a bit glad at the time that we would be able to get back to the hotel. Turning my head, I discovered the whole street was standing still, many, many people gathering together, all standing on the road, cars not moving, everyone looking in the same direction, and many people holding up their phones to take pictures. Do you know? Everyone’s face was glowing golden in the sunset, and all were wearing very happy expressions.

So I turned my head too, looking in the direction everyone was looking. I don’t know how to describe how beautiful it was to you; the sinking sun was hanging between two high-rise buildings, and every part of the street was soaked in sunlight, like heaven.

I was stunned at the time and heard passersby talking, only then realizing that it was the Manhattanhenge, which only happens twice a year. My luck has always been very bad, yet I had such a lucky moment.

I don’t know if you can imagine the picture. That is the happiest thing in my life; I hope it can also make you happy.]