PBMM CH30

“No, it’s okay…” Ning Feng hugged the youth tightly, his voice gentle as he comforted him, “We will find the best doctors, it can definitely be cured!”

The youth smiled bleakly and shook his head, saying no more. The deathly ashen look in his eyes made Ning Feng’s heart tighten. He wanted to comfort him but didn’t know what to say, only dryly repeating, “I will find the best doctors!”

Hearing the man’s words, He Qing looked up blankly, meeting a pair of bloodshot, exhausted eyes. He asked in confusion, “Ning Feng, why are you so good to me?”

Ning Feng paused. He wanted to say because you are my medicine, but the words that came out were full of tenderness: “Because you are worth it.”

“Worth it…?”

The door opened. Yan Xizhi walked in quietly. Seeing the youth looking over with a pair of still red and swollen eyes, he instantly froze in place. The beautiful man tried hard to force a smile, “A-Qing, you’re awake…”

He Qing leaned in Ning Feng’s embrace, his voice hoarse and weak. “It was you, wasn’t it.”

Yan Xizhi didn’t dare to look at those eyes. He averted his gaze, “What…”

“The one who put Lin Wan and me together and made Zhao He choose—that was you, wasn’t it.” The youth’s tone was weak, but his eyes were terrifyingly bright. Enduring the pain radiating from his hands, he continued, “Before I passed out, I heard it. It was your voice.”

He looked at the beautiful man, who was now stiff as stone, sorrow revealing itself in his eyes. “Why on earth did you do it?”

Yan Xizhi glanced away, unable to look at the youth’s face, but happened to catch sight of his tightly bandaged hands. His heart ached, and he panickedly averted his gaze. For the first time, he lost his arrogant, looking-down-on-everyone mentality, stuttering an explanation, “A-Qing, I… I didn’t mean to… I didn’t expect Zhao He would do that, A-Qing…”

The youth shook his head. “I don’t want to hear that. I just want to know why you did it.”

Feng Xinyang stood outside the door. He didn’t dare to go in, didn’t dare to see his lover. The once dashing and romantic playboy was now like a rat in a gutter, only able to hide outside and eavesdrop.

He heard his childhood friend, with whom he had never truly shared a heart-to-heart, answer with a trembling voice: “Because, I love you…”

Yan Xizhi had fantasized countless times about confessing his feelings to the youth, but none of them were in such a despairing situation.

The youth had his hands fractured because of him, his face pale from the pain, leaning in the embrace of another man. The beautiful man held his breath, waiting for his answer, but all he got was He Qing’s laughter.

It wasn’t joyful laughter, but a bitter smile full of agony. Though he was laughing, it looked even more heartbreaking than crying. The deathly pale youth, tears in his eyes, looked at the equally pale Yan Xizhi. “You say, you love me?”

His eyes were full of mockery. “You say you love me… You actually say you love me…”

Ning Feng listened quietly, merely tightening his grip around the youth.

Yan Xizhi, pale-faced, wanted to step forward to explain, “A-Qing…”

“Get lost!!” The youth suddenly flew into a rage. His voice was short and hoarse, entirely lacking its former gentleness. “You love me, so you shared me with Feng Xinyang! You love me, so you tied me up in that place to let me see exactly how much Zhao He hates me! You let my hands be ruined, making it so I can never be a doctor again—this is your so-called love!!”

“You actually call this love?”

“No, it’s not like that…” Yan Xizhi, deathly pale, wanted to explain. But as he racked his brains desperately trying to find an excuse, he realized that what He Qing said was the exact truth.

In the name of love, he had destroyed him.

“No…” Yan Xizhi blankly shed tears. “I just, I just wanted to be with you…”

How did it turn out like this…

With a sharp pain in his heart, the man who had always valued his appearance twisted his face in agony. He had clearly wanted to protect A-Qing; why, in the end, was he the one who hurt A-Qing!

It hurt so much that even breathing was difficult. Yan Xizhi’s forehead bulged with veins. He knelt on the floor in agony, his face turning purple from holding his breath, no longer elegant and exquisite. His lips trembled as he squeezed out a few words from his throat, “A-Qing, I beg you…”

Exactly what he was begging for, the man himself couldn’t clearly say.

He looked at the youth’s cold gaze, looked at him trustingly leaning in Ning Feng’s embrace, looked at those bandaged hands…

Yan Xizhi abruptly stood up. He practically scrambled and crawled to a chair, dismantled a chair leg in a few swift moves, raised it, and smashed it down onto his own left hand.

“Ugh!” Almost immediately, cold sweat broke out on the man’s forehead, yet as if unable to feel the pain, he continued smashing his left hand over and over. While smashing, he flashed a happy smile at the youth who was looking at him in disbelief. “A-Qing, look, I can pay you back. I can pay you back!!”

“I beg you, don’t look at me like that, I really can…” As if terrified He Qing wouldn’t believe him, Yan Xizhi struck even harder. His slender hand rapidly became red, swollen, and bloody at a visible rate. As if relieved of a heavy burden, he showed his bloody hand to the youth. “Look A-Qing, look…”

“Why won’t you say you forgive me? Is it not enough…” Yan Xizhi asked and answered himself, standing up and insanely smashing his right hand against the wall. “I can pay you back, I can…”

The youth watched blankly. A pair of warm, large hands covered his eyes. Ning Feng’s voice remained magnetic and steady: “Don’t look, he’s gone mad.”

Yes, Yan Xizhi had gone mad long ago. It was just that now, having fallen in love with someone, he wanted to sober up.

But why did he feel so awful?

A creeping itch rose from deep within his heart. The youth clutched his chest, his brows furrowing in pain. Ning Feng nervously supported him, “What’s wrong?”

“Uncomfortable…” He Qing, his face pale, was clearly gasping for air, yet the oxygen seemed to evade him. The youth’s face turned blue-purple from suffocation, and he collapsed limply. “Uncomfortable… so hard…”

“A-Qing!” Ning Feng hurriedly caught him, panicking as he noticed the youth’s face turning increasingly purple. He gasped for air like a fish out of water, his body even trembling slightly. “Ugh—”

Ning Feng immediately judged this as a sign of hypoxia, but why—

Without time to think further, he quickly pressed the call button. His large hand rubbed the youth’s back trying to help him catch his breath. Ning Feng’s hands trembled as he backed away. “It’s okay, it’s going to be okay…”

Yan Xizhi stared blankly at the youth, who was normal just a moment ago but was now trembling non-stop with a purple face. Snapping back to reality, ignoring the excruciating pain in both his hands, he ran outside like a madman: “Doctor!! Doctor!!”

Feng Xinyang stood blankly, pushed aside by the rushing doctors and nurses. Watching the youth, now fitted with an oxygen mask, still rolling and struggling in immense pain, “A-Qing… A-Qing…”

“Get lost!” Yan Xizhi shoved him away viciously with his elbow. Watching He Qing’s agonizing state, he was incomparably anxious. Why on earth! He was perfectly fine earlier, why did it suddenly turn out like this!

He didn’t want A-Qing’s forgiveness anymore, as long as A-Qing was well, just well…

No one noticed there was still a Feng Xinyang in the corner. He watched helplessly as A-Qing suffered in despair, watched him grip Ning Feng’s hand tightly with his arm, watched Ning Feng hold him and comfort him. A piercing jealousy formed like a swamp beneath his feet, swallowing him whole.

The doctor diagnosed it as ‘vn’ poisoning. ‘vn’ had to be injected via syringe, and eventually, a tiny needle mark was found on He Qing’s arm. It was this needle mark that had injected the ‘vn’ drug, which, once injected, could never be shaken off.

“The ‘vn’ drug originally existed as an anesthetic, but it was later discovered to be highly addictive. After just one injection, a new dose is needed every five days on average. In Mr. He’s case, it seems the first injection dose was excessively large. This dose is fully capable of being lethal. The severe pain caused by the comminuted fractures in his hands actually counteracted some of the drug’s effects, but in his current situation, his body should already be addicted.”

Ning Feng’s hands, holding the youth, trembled slightly. “Does this drug harm the body?”

“Not at first, but as time drags on and the patient’s dependence on ‘vn’ deepens, the dosage must be increased. Large doses of ‘vn’ will cause hallucinations, insomnia, and mania. The average lifespan won’t exceed 3 years. Our recommendation is drug rehabilitation, but the early stages will also lead to hallucinations and mania. Due to physical agony, the patient will resort to extreme measures to get a ‘vn’ injection, so…”

Yan Xizhi’s hands were a mangled, bloody mess, yet as if unable to feel pain, he clenched his fists tightly, blood dripping down drop by drop. The beautiful man, covered in a pathetic state, said, “A-Qing didn’t know he was injected with ‘vn’.”

Trembling entirely with hatred, his voice shook as he said, “It was Lin Wan…”

He should have guessed earlier. That woman hated A-Qing so much, how could she be willing to just simply put on an act? Only he thought he was playing everyone in the palm of his hand, when in reality, he was the stupidest fool of all!

Feng Xinyang curled up in the corner, watching the doctor sigh in relief, “This makes things much easier. The early stages are much easier to quit than the later stages. As long as the patient isn’t given ‘vn’, as long as he endures this period until the body no longer reacts…”

He sat on the cold floor in a daze, watching the youth lean dependently in Ning Feng’s embrace, watching Ning Feng hold him and comfort him with a soft voice.

Jealousy quietly bloomed in his heart.

After carefully examining He Qing again and prescribing some sedatives, the doctor walked out of the ward. Someone called out behind him, “Doctor…”

He turned around in confusion. The handsome man, with disheveled hair and a dirty face, wearing only a thin single layer of clothing, asked: “Injecting a small dose of ‘vn’ in the early stages, will it truly not cause harm to the body?”

The youth could no longer draw oxygen from the air. A despair-inducing itch rose from everywhere in his body. He wanted to scratch and claw, but his limbs were firmly immobilized by protective restraints. The once gentle youth struggled with a tearful, agonized face, yet couldn’t break free.

The itch rising from his bones made it impossible for him to endure any longer. If it weren’t for these restraints, he would rather jump off a building than suffer this inhuman torment again!

But he couldn’t move!

He could only endure this forcefully, like an immobile mummy placed in a coffin.

It itched so much! It was so unbearable! Someone save him!

Ning Feng was called out by the doctor. He Qing couldn’t speak; he could only stare blankly at the ceiling in despair. He couldn’t even manage to cry.

The door opened.

A completely disheveled Feng Xinyang walked in. Holding a thin syringe in his hand, he came to the youth’s bedside.

Looking at the youth, whose limbs were tightly bound, firmly trapped and unable to move, he gently stroked the youth’s head. Meeting those eyes full of pain that were no longer bright, the man’s gentle voice sounded softly, “Shh… A-Qing, I’m here to help you…”

Under the youth’s pained and bewildered gaze, he pressed the syringe against the inside of He Qing’s arm and slowly injected it.