EHRPS CH167

Tu Tianba flipped the storybook back to where he had left off.

In the previous chapter, the story had progressed to the point where the healer carried the unconscious man back to his secluded valley for treatment. Unfortunately, despite toiling for well over a month and testing countless concoctions, the patient’s condition showed not the slightest improvement, lying there like a corpse that merely happened to breathe.

Until one day.

Holding a freshly brewed concoction, the healer pushed open the door, only to be startled to find the man on the bed awake on his own. In fact, before the healer had even crossed the threshold, the man had sensed someone approaching and instinctively shut his eyes to feign sleep. Fortunately for the healer, his arrival had been sudden; with the man’s severe injuries still unhealed, a momentary lapse in his breathing betrayed him.

What followed next was the “key plot point” the inner demon had mentioned.

Discovering the man was playing possum, the healer made no sound of accusation. Instead, he feigned intimacy by pressing a cold medicinal pestle against the man’s neck and uttered that premeditated lie:

“Wife, you’re awake.”

Glancing over this section of the plot and recalling everything that had transpired today, Tu Tianba could not help initiating a conversation with his inner demon, his expression radiating smug pride: “Compared to this ‘Healer Tu’ in the booklet, this Venerable One completed the task in a single day. My medical skills are truly transcendent—far beyond what ordinary mortals could ever dream of.”

“As expected of me!”

The moment his words fell.

Sharing in the glory, the inner demon chuckled in a dry, mechanical drone:

“…Indeed. As expected of you.”

Tu Tianba accepted this praise without a shred of modesty.

His hands did not pause, leisurely flipping the booklet forward. Sure enough, the previously blank pages were now densely packed with neat, tiny script, and his gaze naturally traced along the lines.

In the story, the damned immortal lord had not blindly swallowed the healer’s one-sided claims. Yet, unable to even recall his own name, and reduced to an invalid who struggled merely to walk, he had no choice but to take up temporary residence here, spending day after day in the healer’s company.

Though the healer claimed they were Dao companions, he found the man utterly alien. Throughout their days together, that nameless wariness and vigilance lurking deep in his heart never truly dissipated.

Harboring sinister designs, the healer naturally put on an act of boundless patience and consideration.

What if the man grew suspicious? What if he treated him with cold detachment?

He had plans of his own.

Whenever night fell and the healer finished taking Nie Wuhui’s pulse, he would light an incense stick meant to calm the spirit and nourish the body. Afterward, he would retreat to his own quarters and use secret arts to awaken the mother Gu resting inside the Gu mound.

He had long since planted both a meridian-blocking Gu and an esoteric curse within the man.

Once the mother Gu awakened, it drove the Gu residing within the man’s flesh, plunging him into vivid illusions night after night.

Bit by bit, countless false memories were seeded into Nie Wuhui’s mind, while his spiritual qi was steadily devoured by the Gu. Over the course of the following year, though his external wounds fully mended, his constitution grew increasingly frail—weaker even than that of an ordinary mortal by a margin of two.

Having waited an entire year, the healer’s patience finally ran dry.

That night.

As was customary, the healer entered Nie Wuhui’s room to take his pulse.

Having done so, he paced unhurriedly over to the table and lit a stick of soul-soothing incense laced with an aphrodisiac blend.

Before long.

Fragrant smoke drifted through the bamboo cottage.

Unable to summon a shred of true essence to ward off the bewitching incense, Nie Wuhui was swiftly engulfed by a feverish heat.

The healer feigned astonishment as he stepped forward to check on him. While ecstasy ran wild in his chest, his mouth spun a blatant lie about “clashing medicinal properties.” Even as he spoke, his hand was already reaching for the lapels of Nie Wuhui’s robes…

Smack!

Never could he have imagined—

Nie Wuhui had actually clung to a shred of conscious will and slapped his hand away?!

Fortunately, his reflexes were swift enough. He instantly plastered a look of wounded hurt across his face, bit the tip of his tongue to spit out a mouthful of crimson blood, and falsely claimed he had suffered a spiritual backlash while trying to help him restore his cultivation. Now that the secret was out, he followed up with a whole basket of spun lies.

In truth, the healer did not need to make things so convoluted.

Yet he was aiming specifically for the man’s Pure Qi Physique. Otherwise, he would have long since used the man as a living test subject; once dead, he could have been buried in the medicinal garden to fertilize the soil, making the spirit herbs flourish all the better, so as not to waste the trouble of hauling him back in the first place.

What a pity…

A Pure Qi Physique could never be plundered by force through unilateral extraction. Both parties had to engage in the union willingly, circulating the dual-cultivation manual in tandem for the other to reap the sweet rewards.

And so, he had no choice but to exploit his “life-saving grace” to demand payment in kind.

At summer’s end, the temperature had already dropped.

Down at the bottom of the river valley, the chill bit even deeper, the damp air cold and heavy. However, a fire crackled within the cave, banishing every trace of dampness. What was more, Tu Tianba had bundled himself tightly inside the giant bear pelt, so much so that a sheen of light sweat had gathered at the nape of his neck.

The air inside the pelt was thin.

His face was flushed red from the heat.

The spiritual crystal cast its glow, illuminating this small, enclosed pocket of space and making the beads of sweat clinging to his skin shimmer brightly. Flipping through the pages, Tu Tianba unconsciously bit his lower lip, his eyes entirely filled with the tiny characters on the paper…

Healer Tu did this and that to the man.

Healer Tu did that and this to the man.

The man appeared rather unwilling. At first, his expression was stiff and constrained, his entire body wound tight. Faced with Healer Tu’s advances, he instinctively turned his head away, offering not the slightest response.

Even so, he complied with the healer’s wishes, circulating the dual-cultivation mental technique.

However, with his spiritual qi entirely depleted, the progress of their dual cultivation was far from ideal. Attempt after attempt was made; it was not until day and night had cycled twice over that the two finally completed their very first session of dual cultivation.

“…”

Tu Tianba’s gaze was transfixed, completely oblivious to the sweat gathering at the tip of his nose.

His almond eyes were wide and round. The moisture dampened the small cinnabar mole on the bridge of his nose, inexplicably stripping away some of the boyish innocence from his features and imbuing him with a peculiar, striking allure.

Tu Tianba had lived for a full three hundred and twenty-seven years. Logically speaking, in the mortal world, someone of his age would be branded an ancient monster. What could there possibly be that he hadn’t seen?

Turns out, there was.

Quite a lot, in fact.

For instance, the very booklet he was currently clutching in his hands.

Of course.

That was not to say Tu Tianba had never read many books.

Though born into poverty where the entire village was comprised of illiterate commoners, Lan Daozi had once meticulously taught him to read and write in order to guide him onto the path of cultivation. Moreover, cultivation manuals were abstruse and profound, demanding a high degree of innate comprehension from the practitioner…

From this alone, it was evident that Tu Tianba, who had achieved Foundation Establishment in ten years, possessed an extraordinary aptitude.

Yet during those ten years, spurred on by Lan Daozi day and night to recite cultivation techniques, he had never dared slack off for a single breath; naturally, he had never laid eyes on trivial fiction.

After that, Lan Daozi dropped his mask and tossed him into the Soul-Refining Cauldron. Only after enduring excruciating torment did Tu Tianba manage to slay that beast-hearted, treacherous Daoist, only to find himself irrevocably fused with the cauldron, plagued incessantly by inner demons.

Under such circumstances, where would he find the leisure to read storybooks?

He had, however, read an extensive amount of medical treatises and ancient records.

Consequently, this was truly the first time Tu Tianba had ever read this sort of… this sort of…

Rustle.

Flushing crimson, he slowly turned the page, the scenes he had just read still lingering in his mind—after their first dual cultivation, the man lay alone on the inner side of the bamboo bed, curled toward the wall. His exposed back was a canvas of overlapping red marks, the ridge of his spine sharp and distinct, tracing an alluring contour.

At this thought, Tu Tianba felt as though a wad of raw cotton had been forcefully shoved down his throat. It soaked up every drop of moisture in his mouth, prompting him to swallow repeatedly. Only after a good while did he belatedly realize…

There was actually nothing in his throat at all.

“Hm?”

Staring at the blank page that followed, Tu Tianba suddenly felt the profound irritation of a cauldron violently exploding halfway through a pill-refining session. Focusing his consciousness, he immediately demanded an answer from the inner demon that had supplied the book:

“Why does it stop here?”

“Didn’t the book’s Healer Tu achieve his goal, chuckling evilly outside the cottage, having already devised a thousand ways to toy with this damned immortal lord while purifying his own spiritual meridians?”

“Such a gratifying scene—this Venerable One wishes to read it right now!”

The next moment.

The bizarre, mechanical voice of the inner demon buzzed by his ear:

“Oh my, the Host needs to complete the key plot point of ‘First Dual Cultivation with the Protagonist’ to unlock the final chapter, you know! When Heaven is about to confer a great responsibility upon a man, surely the Host isn’t going to whine again about not being a cut-sleeve and feeling sick at the sight of men, right?”

“You were reading it very attentively just now, Host~”

Inside the system space.

As if I’d let you read it now!

The white orb of light reached out its little tuft to scratch its belly, muttering under its breath: Given this lunatic host’s mental state, if he saw the part in the original novel where he gets his dick chopped off and his heart pierced by the protagonist, who knows what kind of unhinged rampage he’d go on…

Tu Tianba naturally could not hear the system’s snide remarks.

Even so, he felt an instinctive annoyance—not merely from being unable to read the next chapter, but because he found the way this inner demon spoke increasingly obnoxious, making him itch to administer a good thrashing once and for all.

Just you wait.

Tu Tianba silently assigned it a number in line.

You’re getting slapped next time.

The next second.

It suddenly dawned on him that the task the inner demon spoke of was indeed to sleep with this damned immortal lord—and through mutual, willing dual cultivation, no less. Tu Tianba, still firmly convinced he was not a cut-sleeve, wore an expression of mild revulsion. Yet his mind couldn’t help drifting back to what was described in the book…

Pleasure akin to reaching the pinnacle?

A paradise of bliss that left one utterly entranced?

And a peerless constitution capable of dissolving the foreign, chaotic impurities inside a dual-cultivation partner’s body?

Tu Tianba felt rather displeased.

Why did this damned immortal lord lack for nothing?

It was one thing to be blessed with an extraordinary face, but why did he also have to be so tall and well-built?

He wasn’t lacking in flesh, either.

Even his constitution was the exceedingly rare Pure Qi Physique under heaven, capable of not only purifying the spiritual roots of his dual-cultivation partner, but also using pure spiritual qi to dissolve any chaotic qi inside them…

Sigh.

If only it could purify demonic qi.

If that were the case, he might actually consider turning into a cut-sleeve.

Having reached an impasse with the inner demon, Tu Tianba stowed the booklet away with an annoyed grimace, his mind churning with these thoughts.

However, having worked up a sweat earlier, his skin chafed uncomfortably against the bear fur. Compounded by an inexplicable, stifling heat rising within him, he wriggled a few times, gradually poking his head out from the pelt to catch some fresh air.

The sky outside had not yet darkened, but the daylight was barred from entering the cave.

Fortunately, a vigorously burning fire illuminated the entire cavern, coating every corner in warm hues of orange. The air drifted with the crisp scent of spiritual firewood.

It was Tu Tianba’s favorite woody scent.

To his surprise, the moment his head emerged from the pelt, a broad back entered his vision.

Having regained his mobility, the man sat before the fire with his upper body bare, his white robe draped across his knees. Tu Tianba was looking straight at his back, clearly seeing a rivulet of water trace down the groove of his spine, disappearing at the base of his tailbone.

Leaning slightly, his raven-black hair cascaded loosely over one shoulder. His slender fingers combed through the strands, seemingly shaking loose the droplets trapped within.

The ends of his hair were still damp, resting lightly against the curve of his waist.

With his head tilted as both hands worked through his half-dry hair, the musculature across his back, waist, and arms was traced into clean, fluid lines by the firelight, faintly revealing glimpses of the man’s former grace as a sword cultivator.

Tu Tianba, who had flown into a temper earlier merely from being stared at twice, now found his own eyes completely glued to the sight.

…Damn it all!

He truly wanted a body like that!!

Perhaps the sound of his furious, grinding teeth was simply too loud; the man’s fingers combing through his hair suddenly paused, and he turned his head around without warning—

He caught quite a fright.

The flames danced, and the light and shadows inside the cave flickered along with them.

In a momentary daze, the man saw a colossal bear pelt rise up, its head facing directly toward him with its maw split wide, every sharp fang gleaming with a feral, cold light…

And poking right out from that gaping, bloody maw was a fair, tender little face.

The youth was glaring at him with a murderous intensity, his cheeks puffed up like steamed buns.

The man: “…”